Hearts are Like a Garden
Last summer, amid the beautiful warm weather, I was experiencing heavy spiritual warfare and health struggles. This led me into a 40-day fast, during which the Lord revealed to me something unexpected—I was still holding on to the bitterness from past trauma. I was holding on to the things I thought I had left behind, but deep down, unresolved wounds lingered.
Growing up, I faced mistreatment, bullied for no reason, and ignored by teachers. I was falsely accused, watched my best friend endure brutal bullying, I lost a job I loved, was cursed at, rejected, stolen from, and faced marital issues—the list goes on and on. I know I’m not alone in this. I know you have suffered a great deal, too. And I know this because God is a good Father who brings us the people we need when we need them.
So, sweet sis, I pray this post blesses you.
A Yard in Need of Care
During my fast, God reminded me of a story from 16 years ago when my then fiancé, Rob, and I were just starting our life together. We rented a main-level suite from a nice Asian family who chose us as their tenants. I was so excited because it meant that we would be living within walking distance of my parents’ home. I was also pregnant at the time, and Rob was just beginning his journey out of heavy substance abuse. So being near my parents gave me a lot of comfort.
The suite was very spacious and clean, but it didn’t have a dishwasher or laundry. We still loved it because it had a great view of the mountains, which was a big bonus. However, one downside that weighed on me was the backyard. It wasn’t just overgrown—it was a very large field of weeds.
For years, we kindly asked the landlord who lived upstairs to take care of it. He always promised, “Oh yes, do not worry, I will do it,” making a note to say that it was his responsibility. But, he rarely did. We wanted to respect his word, since after all it was not our home and we were their tenants. When he did get around to it, he would cut so far down that all we had was dirt and flat weeds. As the years went by, I constantly dreamed and hoped that one day the landlord would tend to it with better care. Finally, I said to my husband “I can’t take it anymore!”
This yard was killing my soul. (check out the images below of the process mid-way to final, notice how the ground looks hard.)
So, together as a family—including my sweet 9-year-old daughter—we decided to take matters into our own hands. We started to pull out all the weeds from the root with a special tool that dug deep enough to completely uproot them. We only had the one tool, so we each took turns. At one point, I tried pulling the weeds by hand, but they would not budge. Even with the special tool, it felt as though the weeds were held down by demons—like the enemy himself had anchored them in place. This thought actually crossed my mind, but I do want to mention that this was before I gave my life to Christ.
I fell on my backside so many times. Each time I pulled a root free, it shocked me. I was stunned by the thickness and length of each root. They looked like yams—yes, like the ones used to make yam fries. Years of neglect had allowed these roots to grow so deep that they had infested the whole yard. Even the cherry tree off to the side, once full of potential, did not produce any cherries.
For about two weeks, we worked very hard weeding and tilling. Finally, we got a bigger tool to agitate the hardened soil and added about 10 bags of fresh soil to level the ground. When that was done, we bought large bags of grass seed and patiently watched with anticipation.
Slowly and amazingly, the little blades of grass began to grow healthy and lush. It was beautiful to witness. Not only did we now have a beautiful yard to enjoy, but the once-dying cherry tree began to blossom. It bore cherries, its branches stronger and the cherry blossoms doubled in size.
Our landlords were shocked and grateful; it was a joy to see the lady of the house build a little garden to enjoy too.
Then, last summer, God brought this memory back to me by whispering: Just like your old yard, I am going to show you how to remove every bitter seed life has planted in your heart.
Uprooting the Weeds of the Heart
Honest talk here: In that vicious spiritual storm, all kinds of unresolved issues kept coming up just like weeds. My husband and I were experiencing intense warfare, as the enemy went full tilt on his mind, he was still struggling to stop vaping and drinking beer as coping mechanisms, and my daughter also suffered a great deal. This season in my life was the most excruciating time.
The shaking was intense, but God was preparing us and healing us both at the same time—uprooting all the lies the enemy had planted throughout our lives. Rob battled abandonment issues, and I wrestled with perfectionism.
These strongholds had deep roots, and God wasn’t content with surface-level change. I felt like I was in the valley of the shadow of death—in the pit like Joseph, and in the lion’s den like Daniel—one faith test after the another.
But in that storm, God was always by my side. He never left me.
God led me to counseling, and in the first session as I shared my story, my counselor looked at me with such compassion and said, ”It must have been so hard to carry all of that on my own.” She pointed out that I had nurtured my family for so long but that I also needed nurturing.
The idea of loving myself seemed selfish to me. I believed a lie.
As a Salvadoran woman, culturally I was raised to work hard and serve everyone around me—sometimes to the point of burnout. And when the people we serve don’t appreciate our selfless service, we tend to get a little bitter and that bitterness turns toxic because we are also trained to not say anything and to avoid confrontation at all cost. This was my story, but counseling helped me find my voice. It taught me to be assertive and set boundaries.
Most of the time, it’s easy to let things go, to rebuke and to move forward. But, can I be real with you? Sometimes it’s too hard and the weeds won’t budge. Looking at the areas in my life where I had believed lies about myself was painful, but for me, it was necessary to heal and rebuild everything the enemy had stolen from me.
Years of not being able to speak up was so difficult. It was like I had a mussel over my mouth for years. I was so shy, timid, and bitter because of past trauma. Yes, I was saved by grace! Yes, I Loved Jesus! But, I had allowed little weeds—lies—to grow in my garden, and I didn’t have the tools to pull them out on my own.
Did you know that weeds don’t need tending? They just grow on their own, choking out the nutrients from the soil. That means flowers and plants won't grow to their full potential if you let weeds take over! If we let them, weeds will rob the nutrients our souls need to flourish.
A Heart Tended by God
Sis, God is our ultimate gardener and teacher. He wants to teach us how to remove every lie spoken over us—things like unworthiness, trauma, unresolved issues, anger, etc. If we will just surrender it all, He will tend to our hearts.
I want you to know that God loves you, and when He heals, it will come in many ways. It might be instantaneously; He might point you to scripture, confession, therapy, a doctor, a fast, a better routine to live a healthier lifestyle, a friend, or sometimes He will ask you to wait for his perfect timing. In my experience, it’s been all of the above.
But here is what I want you to remember: if you are going through a storm, it is in that storm God’s faithfulness will be revealed. And through it, He really will build up your faith. He will show you how to tend your garden.
It’s a beautiful and often messy, painful process. However, it has taught me how to trust and believe in Him more than ever before. Rob has also flourished, and God has healed him from the inside out. Praise God! He no longer uses any substances to cope, and I am not striving to be perfect or seek approval from anyone. We know who we are in Christ.
I want to encourage you, sis, to keep trusting and surrendering to the Lord the areas in your life that need tending and repair. Allow Him to teach you how to pull those weeds out from the ROOT!
Your heart needs soft fresh soil, living water (His word), and seeds of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22–23). A well-tended heart flourishes and produces sweet fruit, ripe for the picking.
God wants us to thrive and live abundant lives here on earth and to serve Him well with healed hearts. Because when we are healed from the inside out, we are in a better position to continue to love others well and to run our race well.
Practical Steps to Healing
Before I share some practical tips to heal, the most important thing to mention is this: You cannot heal without God. So, let him in, and don’t rush the process. It will take time—I am still healing.
Let’s break down some actionable steps to healing:
Seek the Lord’s guidance for healing through intentional prayer and surrender to His will.
Ask God what lies you have believed and repent from believing them.
Meditate on scripture daily—read your Bible slowly and repeatedly.
Consider fasting (if it is safe for your situation) Check out free resource below.
Talk to a friend who can pray with you or call a prayer line CBN has a great one 1-800-700-7000
Prioritize your inner health and look for a Christian therapist if needed. Here is a link to BetterHelp or BCG Counselling Group
Get a health check up. Check out Rocket Doctor
Be intentional about rebuilding relationships. Check out this great resource Focus on the family
Take advantage of health insurance—go book an RMT massage at a spa if you want to get fancy and pamper yourself, which I highly recommend.
Start a workout plan—this does not need to be complicated. Check out these free weights and this multi-purpose workout mat
Drink lots of water (at least 8–10 cups a day) Check out these cute glasses
Limit your coffee. We should enjoy coffee, and not abuse it. (coffee affects our nervous systems)
Free Resource: Prayer & Fasting Guide
Click here to access your free resource.
Encouraging Bible verses.
That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither— whatever they do prospers.- Psalm 1:3
The LORD will guide you always; He will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail. —Isaiah 58:11
Final thoughts
Our fruit comes from God, keep trusting God’s healing process—share your journey in the comments!